by Kerry on June 25, 2010
I’m so confused. I know the week just started so how come it’s Friday? Every year the same thing happens to me and and the blurred lines of work/vacation/visitor mode throw me down my own twisted version of the memory lane.
When I was younger I vacationed here and time flew by. I met tons of people, and a mutual love of the Island has kept the majority of them coming back. When I see the familiar faces that I have know for 30+years I am powerless over the regression that happens to me. I am transported back to us as teenagers, foot lose and fancy free, unemployed or part timing it and hitting the beach daily. The combination of summer, people and memories is irresistible and pulls on me during my routine rituals.
I forget that I’m supposed to be waiting until I’ve finished work to get into the water. I forget that I can’t make plans all day every day with the fun people I want to be hanging with. I forget that my job depends on me marketing myself and making business connections. And by far the worst I forget is I forget that I’m no longer that teenager.
30+years ago I met my husband here on Martha’s Vineyard. We weren’t quite ready for each other then, but we came back together at the right time and he is the reason that I am here. I am attached to my past in a way that most people don’t get. I married it. So when the others show up, the rest of our gang, the magic happens all over again.
We are those kids from way back when and its as if time hasn’t passed and age hasn’t caught up with us. We reminisce and tell stories. The music, the atmosphere, the weather are all in sync and we are together again. We are brought back to that time of our lives when the world was our oyster and bad things never happened to people.
Until they did. And then we reminisce about that, about him, about what could have and should have been. And we move on.
It is so easy to be us from back then. We are so comfortable together, we grew up together and we can’t help but fall into our past. And of course I want to go back in time and relive every juicy moment. And yes I am drawn to my old irresponsible self, the girl who couldn’t keep track of time, was always late and partying like there’s no tomorrow.
It is that time now, when all the faces come back, and along with them all the memories. It is now that time starts to get away from me and days blur into each other. It’s hard for me to concentrate, with nostalgia knocking at my door, and my former self begging to be let out. Who knew every summer would take me all the way back and only part of the way forward. The ghosts are talking to me and I can’t help but listen.
I was at a cookout last night with friends, both Islanders and Away-ers. One of my Islander friends asked one of my Away-er friends where she lived, and she said ” you mean in real life? Manhattan”. And such is the perception of Vineyard vs Off Island to many Visitors, homeowners or not. 
Notice that I say Off Island (F’Island to the locals). That covers alot of ground, but is actually only one place…not here. Off Island is Connecticut, Boston, Cape Cod and France. It is Belgium, Lithuania, Canada and Greece. It is all that is not Martha’s Vineyard. Visitors covers alot of ground as well…you can come for the weekend, a week or a month. You can own or rent property, unless you live here full time, you are visiting and therefore a “Visitor”.
I used to be a Visitor. I felt like a local, was attached like a local, kept coming back like a local, but was really visiting from Off-Island. When I hit the ferry and made the crossing my brain did a slight adjustment and the social and political norms of my life Off-Island merged into something less structured.
A little freedom mixed with relaxation surrounded by enjoyment and flavored with excitement. This was not how I felt in my “real life”. I became less organized, less contained, less rigid…more open.I distinctly remember the feeling of letting go. There was something foreign about it that I could not recreate back in Off-Island.
In my youth all my barriers came down when I got on that ferry and it was a complete disregard of even attempting to behave like a normal person. It translated into much debauchery (partying) and a whole lot less self discipline than I (or my poor parents) was accustomed to. I had always been a little lost, a little sad, a little impulsive and my boundaries were further challenged by the foreign concept of vacation and more freedom.
The Vineyard can be too open for some. For those of us who struggle with having enough, getting enough, wanting more, it can be an opportunity to fully examine that aspect of our personalities. There are a surprising number of people who’s “full register” is broken. For whom one is too many, and a thousand never enough. If it is possible to tilt (adjust, recover) that desire it is evident that there is so much more than enough available. Once that demon is contained, the possibilities are endless.
For those who can drink and retain some control (this does not describe me), this is the nirvana of cocktailing and indulgence. It is a license to drink (…I’m on VACATION…) and socialize and relax with abandon. It represents an alternate lifestyle that is not reproduced elsewhere. Hence it is not “real life” to most Visitors.
My world changed so completely when I moved here, it was starting over and adjusting my corporate mind to accommodate some fluidity in my world. The black and white, right and wrong morphed into the gray. The flexibility and compromise of adjusting to a new way of life. A very real way of life.
Because I went from Visitor to Local, I can tell you with confidence that this is in fact, real life. It is different life, requires some creativity and determination, but it is real life. Beyond my wildest dreams my family and I have accomplished so much and continue to find new areas for growth, both personal and vocational. It is like someone put out a blank canvas and said…paint your dream… and it will become real.
Settling in nicely to our fabulous new house, it is easy to forget that; 1) we really do need to sell it and 2) it truly is a marvel of energy efficiency.
When we began the construction of this house, we were completely focused on building a green home and lessening the environmental impact that the building process can create. There are so many areas to consider, from materials and carbon footprint to location and design.
Having recently finished his LEED AP exam, my husband and his company were excited to be able to apply this new understanding of environmentally friendly building ideals to a house on Martha’s Vineyard. The LEED rating system is a comprehensive point-value system that rewards different levels of environmental building and design. This was an opportunity to build the 1st LEED for Homes Gold rated house on Martha’s Vineyard and we went for it.
In our excitement and enthusiasm for all things recycled, renewed and reworked, we lost track of the fact that we were deep in a recession and the housing market is always the first to go. I’m not saying that we weren’t aware of it, only that we were convinced that this house was so fantastic and unique and spectacular, that we would be able to sell it DESPITE the total economic collapse of the United State s financial market.
In our enthusiasm we enjoyed open houses that were beyond our wildest dreams, we showed the house to anyone who expressed an interest. We happily and with great passion expounded on the unique features and environment saving aspects of our amazing house, all 3477 square feet of it…and then, before you knew it, time was up.
Our construction loan had run its course and the extension we got from our lender was at almost double the original rates. In other words, despite our conviction that we were doing all the right things, despite all the support and well wishes from the neighbors and the local press, we had not sold the property in our allotted time.
Creative times call for creative solutions, and the one that made the most sense involved renting out our regular house and moving into the fabulous one as our primary residence. Then we could buy the house from ourselves and refinance to take advantage of the amazing rates being given by the banks.
So here I am, in my spectacular new home in all its energy efficient glory, wondering how long it can last. Even though my furniture is PERFECT in the living room and I ADORE the high ceilings and wide pine floors (locally harvested I might add) and the landscaping project is like the icing on the cake…we need to keep moving. It is easy to forget that this house is unlike any other because it was built with considerably higher standards than other homes. It feels good to be in it, it feels comfortable and safe and special.
Our goal is and always has been to put up this magnificent house as an example of what can be done with construction today in keeping with environmental awareness. We want to build more of them and continue to learn and be examples of change for future generations.
The fact that I am enjoying my cup of tea in this house is simply a happy side effect of the bigger plan and my family and I feel lucky for the opportunity…We also look forward to passing it along to the next owner and celebrating an amazing achievement.
For more information on this property LEED Green Home Martha’s Vineyard.
